Dear Someone,

Psychology, Suicide / Thursday, November 30th, 2017

Chances are, you know someone with a mental illness. Suicide and mental illness can be extremely difficult to talk about, especially for individuals that are facing daily challenges because of it. This is an open letter to someone or anyone, that needs a reminder on  how important, loved, wanted, and needed they are.

When you think too much time has passed, that they have forgotten, or that they have stopped caring, you’ll be wrong- so, so wrong. Click To Tweet

Dear Someone,

You’re always on their mind. They struggle with losing you as a friend because they enjoyed having you around. For months they have asked themselves the same questions over and over again: What did I do wrong? Can I fix it? Why is this happening? They just want to be there for you. They want to be supportive and sincere in their intentions. You laughed together, shared fun times together, and they counted on you to be the one person they liked when surrounded by artificial and judgmental people.

Then, things happened. Things that are hard to think and talk about – and that’s ok. If you never talk about them – that too, is ok. But, they want you to know something…

They Are Not Regretful

Even if they could, they wouldn’t take back what they did to save your life. They do not regret their actions. They never think, “I wish it hadn’t of been me that saved you.” Because in their heart and mind, it makes no difference how big or small of an existence you had in their life. They did what they did, because your life and presence is important. You matter. Not just to them, but to everyone in your life. You are needed. You are wanted. You are loved.

That hesitation symbolizes bravery, and the bravery symbolizes hope. Click To Tweet

Judgment Doesn’t Exist

They do not judge you for your struggles and hardships. They have never thought less of you as a person, spouse, parent, or friend. They applaud you. You’ve faced and are now working towards overcoming hopelessness an outsider may never fully comprehend.

It may take time to see it the way others do but, there were moments of hesitation when ending your life felt like the only way out. That hesitation symbolizes bravery, and the bravery symbolizes hope. You are brave for getting help, for fighting through the dark in the hope of a better tomorrow. They believe that, and so should you.

They support you relentlessly. They support you on the ugliest and most luminous days. They support you in the times that call for celebration and in the times that call for tears, or even anger. They support you when you think they have given up on trying to be supportive. Their support has no limits nor an ending.

They Aren’t Trying to “Fix” You

Regardless of what you may think, they are not interested in making you their personal success story. This isn’t something that “gets fixed,” this is something you learn to manage. And you will, with the help of professionals and a strong support system. They do not want to fix you, they just want you to know that you’re worth it, even if you don’t always see it. They are only interested in supporting you.

They Will Always Be There For You

They understand that they can’t be selfish. If a relationship can no longer exist after what happened, they will understand. I promise you; they will completely and sincerely understand. Of course, they will miss having you in their life, but they know your well-being is more important than their own wants to have you in the day-to-day grind of life. Please do not mistake this for abandonment. Because, should there ever come a time – six months, a year, or ten years later- every word I have written will still stand true for them.

When you think too much time has passed, that they have forgotten, or that they have stopped caring, you’ll be wrong- so, so wrong.


One of “them”

If you or someone you know is thinking about suicide or needs emotional support, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline network is available 24/7 across the United States by calling 1-800-273-8255.

For more information please, visit The National Suicide Lifeline

9 Replies to “Dear Someone,”

  1. Thank you for writing this. I have seen someone very close go through this and it’s not easy for them or for people who love them.

  2. This is great. I’ve been there too. I don’t often talk about it — and I know that is part of the problem. Those of us that have been there like to put it behind us. Vicious cycle. xoxo

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