Rejection as an Adult

College, Psychology / Wednesday, September 21st, 2016


So, secret is out. This happened last Friday. Normally I wouldn’t share this with anyone outside of my best friend and husband. However, I’ve been on this social media kick lately about how people only share the top 5% of their lives on social media. We constantly see happy couples kissing in parks (guilty), the cutest, cleanest, well put together kids (guilty), job promotions (somewhat guilty), the ‘my spouse is better than yours’ post (guilty), etc. etc. What I really love and rarely see on social media is reality. I can ‘love,’ ‘like,’ ‘laugh’ and appreciate your REAL posts so much more than your I love my life posts. Tell me how your kid took a dump in the tub tonight instead of how much you love your husband, because lets be honest – your passive aggressive e-card said otherwise two weeks ago.

Moving on… this is life, also known as reality. And the truth of the matter is that life is not always a picture on Facebook that got you 180 likes. I’m sure my closest Facebook friends would comment with something encouraging and thoughtful and it would make me feel great for a minute. Then I would stop and remember that I’m about to be 31 in a month and I’ve been rejected from a Graduate program. Rejection at this age is a much bigger pill to swallow and Facebook comments just wouldn’t cut it; so, I saved myself and Facebook from having to chalk up a half-hearted comment, had a small pitty party in my car after dropping the kids off at daycare, played hookie from work and moved on.

I remember when rejection meant not being asked to homecoming by the hot guy in Biology. Or, not making the starting line-up for the first basketball game of the season. It’s true, my priorities were different then therefore, those rejections felt like they were the end of life as I knew it…Ha! Jokes on me. Rejection as an adult in any form has me stopping in my tracks and reevaluating the last five years of my life. It’s possible that rejection never gets easier to accept but it does provide us the opportunity to explore other options.

If I had to find the silver lining (trust me, I’ve been searching for a few days) I found that this rejection in particular has (somewhat) forced me to see what else is out there. It’s keeping me motivated. It’s a driving force to continue to further my education, to set an example for my children and to overall, just be better at life. It would be really easy to throw in the towel right about now. Especially since this has been my longest break from school in about 5 years – I have gotten a lot done and I’ve loved every minute of ‘free time!’

I guess, the point I’m trying to make is that although rejection at any age is hard to understand and emotionally accept we can take it and run with it until we find something that is fit for us or we can come to a stand still and let it be “the end of life as we know it.” It may just be my bitchy disposition but when someone tells me “no, you aren’t good enough” I’m going to find a way to be good enough and then I’m going to take my ‘good enough’ ass somewhere else and be fan-fricken-tastic.

Rejection is not the end. It’s the beginning of a new motivational movement in your life to not only meet the goals you set, but to exceed your own expectations. It’s a motivating factor in getting where you want to be; and once you make it, you will stand tall, shine bright, and hold your middle finger up in the air to the ones that said “your GPA did not meet the requirements for the program.”

So, cheers to plan B!

side note: I have a 3.2 – they wanted a 3.5 but accept applications for  a 3.0 or higher. 


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